I admit – this is totally a rant.

If I took any of these quotes from your face book — please forgive me.  I won’t put names on them.  They are just some things that friends have posted within the last 24 hours that have caused me to think.

” . . . is sick of having to watch her weight!! How come we all can’t just be skinny and cute without having to sweat our butts off at the gym and living on water and lettuce alone???”

” . . . Is on a fruit and veggie fast.”

” . . . i feel skinny oh so skinny i feel skinny and…..skinny and….uh….SKINNY!! haha. visualization my dear.”

I was also with one of my favorite people yesterday – she is beautiful and in her 20’s.  She is extremely slender — like she weighs maybe 105.  She mentioned that she had gotten fat an was trying to lose weight.

I think of all the times I have thought these same things.  Even when I was thin I felt as fat as I am right now.  Losing weight, thinking about losing weight, and feeling guilty for not losing weight has been my lifelong hobby.  How did all us incredible women get this way?  This place where we have based so much of our worth and success as a human being on what the blasted scale says.  I’m not talking about being healthy and listening to and loving our bodies.  I’m talking about how we as good righteous women still are so full of angst and dissatisfaction with our bodies.  I’m one of them.  I battle that mindset but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to being one of them.

This morning on Face book an acquaintance who somehow ended up being listed as a “friend” posted this on his account:

“. . . is so glad that all the attractive girls FLOCK to the city of XXXX. Thank goodness there aren’t a bunch of single heffers desperate to find a husband roaming around town. Man! That would be awful if that were the case. Phew!!”

I read this before starting work this morning.  I’m still angry.  Not because he’s a guy who is attracted to thin women – that’s totally his right.  It’s that his attitude (that he obviously has no reservations sharing) is exactly part of the problem of why so many women are in this lifelong battle with their body, weight, and self worth.  It’s the judgment that a women who is overweight has less worth than their slender sisters.  And who is it that defines what a “heffer” (uhhh spelled “heifer” – spell your insults correctly please) is?  In the minds of some of some of my amazing friends who are zipping their size 4 jeans – it’s them.   It’s also in the minds of those who are putting on size 12 and even size 20.   Many sizes – same issues.

I call for a rebellion against this attitude wherever it is.  I call for loving who we are – right now.  I call for nourishing and nurturing ourselves and letting our bodies go to it’s normal and healthy weight.   That doesn’t mean binging and drowning ourselves in unhealthy foods.  It also doesn’t mean restricting ourselves from everything until we are totally obsessed and in a no-win battle against ourselves.  It doesn’t mean giving up exercise.  It does mean respecting who we are and standing up against the unhealthy messages that bombard us.  It means letting go of even giving ourselves those same unhealthy messages.  Our bodies and spirits make our soul.  It’s time we started nourishing and respecting both.

My First Movie or My Family IS a Bunch of Rednecks

This is my first movie.  This is NOT Steven Spielberg quality.   This is what my family does for fun on the 4th of July.

My Secret Recipe

I have been going to Girls Camp for years!  Anyone who has been to camp with me will testify that the one thing that is a must (besides extra underwear) is Candy Casserole.  Everyone loves, loves, loves my candy casserole and up until now the recipe has been a secret.  There are several variations but I shall share the most basic recipe.

Gather all the ingredients and a rather large sized bowl.  You will also need a wooden spoon.  I choose a wooden spoon because I feel that it is a little more gentle with the tender ingredients than a metal spoon,or heaven forbid, a wisk.

Ingredients:
Tootsie Rolls
Licorice Bites
Plain M&M’s
Starbursts (Skittles can easily be used as a substitute)
Peanut Butter M&M’s (THIS is the secret ingredient)  DO NOT substitute Peanut M&M’s as it will change the texture of the finished product.

You can also add other ingredients such as Teddy Grahams, Good N’ Plenty, or Hot Tamale’s.  I learned by sad experience to avoid any of the “gummy” type candy’s as they leave the finished product a sticky goopy mess.

Begin by pouring the Tootsie Rolls into the bowl.  Do NOT stir at this point.  You want the Tootsie Rolls to be able to rest for a minute.

Add all other ingredients except for the Peanut Butter M&M’s.  Gently stir the mixture together.

Now add the Peanut Butter M&M’s and gently fold them in.  I prefer folding the mixture to avoid bruising the delicate chocolate layer of the PBM&M and I suggest that you also use this method.

The casserole is now finished and ready to transfer in to you official “Candy Casserole” jar.  I prefer to sample the Candy Casserole at this stage to make sure the flavors are at their peak.  It would be appropriate to sample each flavor.

Transfer your casserole into an airtight plastic container.

You are now ready to enjoy girls camp!

Voted the Best . . .

Do you ever go to restaurants and see awards and articles framed saying things like “voted best egg breakfast”? There are even billboards in Utah showing the “best in Utah” awards.  I always wondered who it was that was voting it the “best” and you never know who the competition is to know if it truly was the best.  So I held my own contest where I vote what is the best.  Like those before me I won’t tell you who the competition is.  These are 7 things that I personally have voted BEST!

Best Lip Stain

Winner:  Outlast Lip Stain

Easy to apply applicator makes color go on smooth.  Natural looking and not gooey or too runny.  The makings of perfect lip stain.

Best Cake

Winner:  Mrs Backers Pastry Shop

Delightful fluffy cake with lucious buttercream frosting.  Best when eaten cold and slowly savored.  Yes I know there are a bajillion little cupcake places now but nothing beats a Mrs. Backers.

Best Healthy Place to Eat

Winner:  Au Naturale

Located at 880 East 2100 South in Salt Lake City.  How could anything be so yummy and so good for you?  The sweet potato fries are a must but don’t get them to go.  They are baked and should be eaten immediately  so they don’t go soggy.  But truth be told — I’d eat them soggy too.  Try the frozen yogurt.  This is what frozen yogurt is supposed to taste like.

Best Book I’ve Read in the Last Year

Winner:  The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

The narrator of the story is “death” and he weaves an incredible tale of Germany during World War II.  Death is intrigued by 9-year old Liesel and her desire to learn to read.  Her family is also hiding a Jew.  It’s a tear-jerker but I didn’t feel manipulated in to crying like some “tear-jerking” stories do.  This is one that makes you think.

Best Online Time Waster

Winner:  Tie between Facebook and Slide Solitaire

Best Funny Thing I Did Lately

Winner:  Changing the mail notification sound on a co-workers computer to a burp.

Best Workout

Winner: My Sisters Wii AE Active

I totally kicked butt on this — and it totally kicked my butt.

A special thanks to all who attended the awards ceremony which was held at my residence tonight.  Ice water and Pumpkin Chocolate Chip muffins were served.  I also appreciate those who overlooked all the camp stuff collecting in the computer room where the ceremony was held.

Broken Things

Sometimes I feel like God gave me this wonderful life filled with wonderful opportunities.  Then “life happened” (at a very young age) and it seems that I somehow messed up those wonderful gifts he gave me.  Like He gave me a toy and as I played with – it got broken.  Worse is that I didn’t break it all myself.  Others took my toy and did damage too – but it was still mine and somehow I allowed it.  Ashamed that I allowed something so precious to be broken I then go about trying to fix it so that when God asks for it back He won’t be mad.  So I try all kinds of super-glues but it’s never put back together perfectly.  But I keep trying in vain.  What I forget is that He knew that life was a messy business and the toys are going to get broken and that if we bring it to Him, with a gentle smile He will fix it.  What is it that keeps me from just allowing the Savior to fix it to start with? Why do I keep taking it back saying like the willful child “I can do it myself”?

It’s not a new story – in fact it dawned on me that even in the Garden of Eden after Eve and then Adam took the fruit the first thing they did when God came was to hide.  I figured out that it was Satan who introduced shame into the world.  The kind of shame that makes you want to hide instead of sorrow that makes you want to go to your Father for healing.  We are funny human creatures – because instead of telling Adam and Eve to hide the scriptures tell us that God made coats of skins to cover them.  He didn’t say “I’m coming you better grab some leaves and hide from me because boy you are in trou-ble!”  That wasn’t God’s message at all – more like the message of someone who would rather have us stay broken (“hmmmm who could that be?  Could it be Satan?”) – The Lord explained the consequences of the human condition and then covered them in something that would be comforting and warm.

I think the scriptures tell us to “submit” to the will of God not just because it will teach us a good lesson about being humble, but also because the Savior has so much love, compassion, and healing for us if we will let Him in.

Broken clouds give rain; …

Broken storms yield light.
The break of day heals night.
Broken pride turns blindness into sight …

Could it be that God loves broken things? …

And yet, our broken faith, our broken promises
Sent love to the cross
And still, that broken flesh, that broken heart of His,
Offers us such grace and mercy,
Covers us with love undeserving.

This broken soul that cries for mending
This broken heart for offering
I’m convinced that God loves broken ME
Praise His name—my God loves broken things!

(Kenneth Cope)