What Desirest Thou?

on September 28, 2012

As I am reading in the Book of Mormon, I am reading the part of the Nephi about to be shown Lehi’s vision of the Tree of Life.  But before he receives that remarkable vision the Lord asks this question “What desirest thou?”  I’ve been thinking about this for days.

What if the Lord were asking me that question – “DeAnn what do you really desire?”  How would I answer?  Am I prepared to mean the answers I want to give?  My first answer would be to be free from this eating addiction.  To eat when I’m hungry and stop when I’m satisfied.   To return to a normal body size that is good for me.

I then have to ask myself if I really truly mean that – it would mean that I would not turn to food to cope.  That crutch – that I have relied on for years – would be gone.  Am I ready for that?  Really?  Have I been going through the motions for so long acting as if that is what I want?  What I wonder – is if the Lord is there with the gift of healing and I just haven’t been willing – truly willing to accept it?  Have I not had that miraculous change of heart because I have been truly at my very depths been unwilling to allow my heart to be changed?

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2 responses to “What Desirest Thou?

  1. Erin says:

    This is really profound I think. I need to start asking myself these questions. Thanks for the insight!

  2. tikenmoose says:

    I’ve been trying to “meditate” while reading scriptures lately, and have been asking myself similar questions. I think we all struggle with something – a crutch – that we go to when we don’t want to face something more difficult. I’m glad to know it’s not just me! I’m an emotional eater too – along with many other things I don’t care to admit outloud just now. I think you’re awesome!

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